| 31. Divorcing Jack (1998) |
The blackest sort of black comedy there is, which, if you don't know what's coming (I didn't), will catch you completely off-guard. It starts out as an irrevent comedy-comedy, and turns very dark, very suddenly...
K. Wedgwood's plot summary over at the IMDB gave us a chuckle: "A married drunk hooks up with the ex-girlfriend of a vicious local criminal. He gets booted out of home for his infidelity, has a murderer on his tail, and must try to write the story of his life in order to save his journalism job. He gets help from a stripper dressed as a nun and goes undercover dressed as Shaggy from Scooby Doo. He finds a drinking buddy in an American fellow journalist."
But if you want to know what really happens...
One day in a park, alcoholic womanizer and newspaper columnist Dan Starkey (David Thewlis) meets Margaret (Laura Fraser), an attractive young student capable of keeping up not only with Starkey's drinking, but with his quick wit as well. Charmed (and without knowing her name), Starkey asks her to accompany him to a party. There, we meet Starkey's long-suffering wife, Patricia (Laine Megaw), who later catches him kissing Margaret. Patricia rakes him over the coals and leaves, but instead of going after her, Starkey goes home with Margaret and spends the night with her.
When he comes home the next morning, he finds an answering-machine message from Patricia telling him she's going to stay with her parents for a few days, and that each should use this time to figure out the future — oh, and that he'll find one of his collectible vinyl LP records (worth 300 quid) in the toaster grill.
Starkey isn't terribly rattled by the possibility of an impending divorce, nor by the ribbing he takes from his co-workers, who are well aware he spent the night with a "wee" bit o' fluff. While his boss is screaming at him to get back to work, Starkey calls Patricia and swears he wasn't unfaithful, and that he was gone all night "walking the streets." But he still doesn't seem very upset about the idea of his wife leaving him.
While Patricia is gone, Starkey continues seeing (and sleeping with) Margaret, who knows he's married and loves his wife (she doesn't care). Patricia certainly cares; one day when Margaret enters her apartment, the windows start shattering. Gunshots? No; it's Patricia hurling potatoes from the alley below. Finished, Patricia screams up at Margaret that she can have Starkey.
At one point, Margaret opens a birthday present from her father in front of Starkey; it's a collection of audio tapes of classical music. She insists on gifting Starkey with one tape, of Antonín Dvorak (say DVOR-zhak out loud, and see if you can guess why the pronunciation is important), with the promise that he can come back for each of the other 23 tapes.
Meanwhile, Starkey meets up with Boston Globe journalist Charles Parker (Richard Gant) as the two men are cleared to cover Northern Ireland's upcoming elections, focusing on Prime Minister frontrunner Michael Brinn (Robert Lindsay), who is campaigning on establishing permanent peace (he says) between the country's warring Catholics and Protestants, despite having been the victim of a terrorist bombing himself.
Starkey doesn't buy Brinn's rhetoric, and even attempts to embarrass him in public (by demanding to know why he dropped the "O'" from his family name of O'Brinn). Parker, meanwhile, for reasons we can't imagine (other than the fact that Parker can drink Starkey under the table with no visible ill effect), takes a liking to Starkey, befriending him and standing by him, even after (much later in the film) the two are chased on the road by Protestant paramiltary skinheads who fire pistols and ram Parker's car. The assailants, Starkey says, have been after him ever since he wrote something "sarcastic" about them a few years earlier.
Meanwhile, back at the Margaret situation... One night after making love, Starkey and Margaret are craving chips, so Starkey goes out to buy some. Find the nearest chips shop closed (due to "varicose veins" - !), he buys pizza instead. He enters Margaret's apartment and finds her on the bed, covered in her own blood and minutes away from death. Starkey, who by this time has fallen in love with her, manages to keep himself from having a complete meltdown as Margaret dies... but not before she utters what sounds like "Divorce... Jack... Divorce... Jack..." She then chokes on her own blood and shuffles off this mortal coil.
(Best line so far is Starkey's response to the emergency operator on the phone, who asks, "What service do you require?" "Every f-ing service!")
Suddenly, Starkey hears the front door open, and, thinking the killer is either still in the apartment or has returned, creeps out to investigate, and encounters a shape in the stairwell. Starkey attacks the intruder, and, next thing you know... Well, as Starkey later says directly to the camera:
"I sat and thought of lovely Margaret, of her hair and her eyes and her laugh and the way she kissed me and her skin that smelled of mandarin oranges. She had died in my arms. What would she think of me now? Would she still want me now that I had pushed her mother down the stairs and broken her neck?"
With Margaret dead in bed, Margaret's mother dead at the bottom of the stairwell, and Margaret's blood all over himself, rather than stay at the scene of the crime, Starkey runs.
The next day, Parker picks up Starkey for their big interview with Brinn. Starkey, with Margaret's murder foremost in his mind, isn't quite his old jolly, devil-may-care self, and attributes his subdued mood to a hangover.
After Parker hammers Brinn with a series of hard questions (those darn Yanks!), a call comes in about the deaths of Margaret and her mother. Turns out Margaret is the daughter of one of the high-ranking members of Brinn's political party — and she's also the girlfriend of domestic terrorist Patrick "Cow Pat" Keegan (Jason Isaacs). This is not good. (And it's on their way back from Brinn's house that Parker's car is attacked by the Protestant skinheads.)
Despite everything that's gone on, Starkey is compelled to call Patricia again, but doesn't have change for the pay phone. (This is 1999, remember, so don't ask why he doesn't have a cell phone; almost nobody did). He approaches a hairy young street vendor selling tapes to ask for change, which the young man refuses to give him. Desperate, Starkey produces the Dvorak tape Margaret had given him and offers to sell it to the young man for the mere cost of 50p. After hesitating a moment, the hairy young man gives him the money and takes the tape.
Starkey phones Patricia. Their call is interrupted by a ruckus that sounds like Patricia is being murdered — but she's only ("only"!) being kidnapped by Keegan. At wits' end, Starkey finally tells his new friend Parker everything that's happened in the past few days. He begs Parker to keep his mouth shut, and not go to the poilce.
Parker agrees to help him. He learns that Margaret did know a man named Jack. Starkey finds this Jack and beats the tar out of him in an attempt to get him to confess to murdering Margaret. But Jack really had nothing to do with it.
That night, Starkey has another run-in with the militant Protestants and is shot in the leg. He's rescued by a nun in a small car. Lee (Rachel Griffiths) isn't really a nun; she's a nurse by day and stripper by night. She brings him home to her place and takes care of him, and shows no fear when she tells him she knows who he is and that the authorities are searching for him.
Lee plays some music, which she identifies as Dvorak (say DVOR-zhak, remember?), and Jack suddenly realizes Margaret's last words were not "Divorce Jack"; she was saying "Dvorak." Starkey needs to get the tape back.
Starkey meets Parker at a restaurant, and finds out how Parker intends to "help" him; Parker has set him up to be captured by Keegan (but then, it appears Keegan forced Parker to lure Starkey out into the open). Keegan and his minions take Starkey and Parker to an empty flat in a high-rise, where Parker is dangled upside down outside the window. If Starkey doesn't give Keegan the tape, Keegan will cut the rope holding Parker aloft. Starkey swears he doesn't have the tape; Keegan cuts the rope, and Parker plummets many stories to the street.
When Keegan produces the captive Patricia and threatens to kill her in the same manner, Starkey begs for Patricia's life and finally admits he had the tape, but sold it. Keegan is about to cut the rope holding Patricia when Lee, in her nun's habit, bursts in with an automatic pistol. Starkey, Lee, and Patricia escape.
Starkey goes back to the hairy street vendor to retrieve the tape, but the vendor tells him he sold it to a priest. Starkey manages to track down the priest, who plays the tape; it's a recording of Brinn confessing to planting the bomb he had claimed was set by terrorists. Starkey goes to the post office to mail the tape to Margaret's apartment (we don't understand exactly why he does this), but is again taken captive again by Keegan.
Keegan orders Starkey to drive to a spot out in the middle of nowhere for an exchange in which Brinn (who, of course, wants the tape very badly) will pay Keegan a huge sum of money. (Why Keegan makes Starkey bring the tape, instead of just killing Starkey and taking the tape himself, we don't know.) Starkey does as he's told, handing over the tape, which Keegan inserts in a portable player before giving it to Brinn, who forks over a suitcase full of cash.
As Brinn and his underlings drive away, Brinn pops the tape out of the player, and his car suddenly explodes in a ball of flame. With Brinn out of the way, Keegan and his gang leave Starkey and drive off. The goon riding shotgun opens the suitcase and picks up a stack of cash, only to see a red LED clock counting down the seconds. The suitcase, like the tape recorder, is a booby trap; Keegan's vehicle blows up.
Later, Starkey, now out of danger, is approached by high-ranking civil servants who try to convince him not to write his story for publication. Starkey delivers a few choice words about the queen, then goes home to start over with Patricia.
Random notes: I'm pretty darned good at understanding accents/brogues of any kind (especially Irish, having been schooled by Irish nuns for eight years), but David Thewlis's manner of speaking had me stymied throughout most of the film. (I spent many minutes wondering why everybody was searching for some sort of "tip" before I realized they were all saying "tape.") Fortunately, the rest of the Irish folks (and Rachel Griffiths, an Australian with a gift for accents rivaling that of Meryl Streep's), speaking far more clearly, compensate for Thewlis's decidedly muddy speech.
— JR
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles D/Divorcing Jack (1998) |
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| 32. Alfie (1966) |
Selfish, self-centered hedonist Alfie (Michael Caine) seduces virtually every "bird" he meets (including a nurse in the sanatorium where he's being treated for tuberculosis), because he can (and because the pre-feminist women are stupid enough to put up with his narcissistic, misogynistic ways; he even refers to the female being as "it").
One of his married conquests, Lily (Vivien Merchant), gets pregnant, and Alfie (who has already refused to marry the mother of the product of an earlier affair) arranges for her to have a (literal) kitchen-table abortion. Seeing the dead fetus sobers Alfie up in a hurry, and he decides to settle down and marry rich widow Ruby (Shelley Winters) — but when he goes to see her, finds she's replaced him with a new, younger lover. Past his prime and abandoned by all the women he's bedded, Alfie is forced to reevaluate his life.
Followed by:
Alfie Darling (1976) We need a spoiler!
Remade as:
Alfie (2004)
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles A/Alfie (1966) |
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| 33. Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948) |
a.k.a. Bud Abbott and Lou Costello Meet Frankenstein
Postal workers Wilbur (Lou Costello) and Chick (Bud Abbott) make a delivery to McDougal's House of Horrors, a wax museum, not knowing the crates they're carrying contain the bodies of Dracula (Bela Lugosi) and Frankenstein's monster (Glenn Strange). After Dracula rises from the dead (or the crate), Wilbur looks inside the other crate; Dracula hypnotizes Wilbur, then takes off with the monster to Dracula's remote island castle. Museum owner McDougal (Frank Ferguson) arrives and, seeing the empty crates, thinks Wilbur and Chick have stolen their contents.
Meanwhile, back at the castle, Dracula and the monster are making plans with a woman named Sandra Mornay (Lenore Aubert) to transplant Wilbur's brain into the monster's skull. Meanwhile, Larry Talbot, better known as the Wolf Man (Lon Chaney, Jr.), tells Wilbur and Chick about the plan, then has the boys lock him inside his room for the night so he can't hurt anybody when the full moon rises.
The next day, Joan Raymond (Jane Randolph), an investigator working for McDougal, flirts with Wilbur in an effort to learn where he's hidden the supposed wax figures belonging to McDougal. Wilbur ends up taking her to a fancy-dress party, even though he already has a date with Sandra (who he believes in his girlfriend, when Sandra is really just cozying up to him to get his brain). While waiting for Sandra to dress for their date, Wilbur gets a call from Talbot telling him that Dracula and the monster are somewhere in the castle. Wilbur searches for them, finds them, gets chased around by them...
Meanwhile, Sandra finds out what Joan is really up to, so Dracula hypnotizes Joan — but ends up biting Sandra, turning her into a vampire. Meanwhile, Talbot turns into the Wolf Man and attacks McDougal, who thinks Talbot is Chick (who dressed as a wolf for the costume party).
There's a big chase through the woods; Dracula captures Wilbur and Joan and takes them back to the castle. Just as Sandra is about to transplant Wilbur's brain into the monster, Chick and Talbot arrive to save him — but not before Talbot turns into a werewolf again. The monster breaks loose and throws Sandra out the window while Wilbur and Chick make a run for it, and while Wolf Man Talbot chases Dracula outside and into the ocean, where they both drown, breaking every silver-bullet and wooden-stake rule of every werewolf and vampire movie in history.
Joan comes out of her trance, and she and the castle's resident Igor, Dr. Stevens (Charles Bradstreet), burn the monster to death. Wilbur and Chick escape on a boat, only to realize that they have a passenger: the Invisible Man (voice of Vincent Price).
Follows:
Dracula (1931)
Frankenstein (1931)
Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
Dracula's Daughter (1936) We need a spoiler!
Son of Frankenstein (1939) We need a spoiler!
The Wolf Man (1941)
The Ghost of Frankenstein (1942) We need a spoiler!
Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943) We need a spoiler!
Son of Dracula (1943) We need a spoiler!
House of Frankenstein (1944) We need a spoiler!
House of Dracula (1945) We need a spoiler!
Remade as:
Shame on You (1954) We need a spoiler!
Frankestein [sic] el vampiro y compania (1962) We need a spoiler!
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles A/Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948) |
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| 34. The Wizard of Gore (1970) |
Montag the Magnificent (Ray Sager), who likes to gives speeches about the nature of reality ("What is real? Are you certain you know what reality is?"), performs gruesome magic tricks on willing females (cutting them in half with a chainsaw, using an electric drill on them, spiking them through the head, that sort of thing), who emerge healthy and in one piece, but later turn up dead by the same methods by which they were mutilated onstage.
A TV talk-show hostess Sherry Carson (Judy Cler) suspicious of Montag has him on her show, but instead of just performing a trick, Montag hynotizes everybody in the studio, starts a fire, and guides Sherry and a couple of cops toward the blaze. Sherry's boyfriend Jack (Wayne Ratay) saves Sherry and the cops and shoves Montag into the fire, killing him.
Later, alone with Sherry, Jack pulls off a skin-like mask to reveal that he is Montag. (What, she didn't know her own boyfriend from a disguise?) Montag delivers another short talk on reality before scooping out Shery's guts with his bare hands.
Before she dies, Sherry gives Montag a little lesson in reality, telling him that he doesn't really exist; he's just a figment of her imagination. When Montag insists that he is who he is, he's suddenly back onstage, giving his reality talk. Cut to Sherry and Jack in the audience; Sherry tells Jack she thinks Montag is a phony.
So none of this really happened. We guess. But then... "What is real?"— JR
Remade as:
The Wizard of Gore (2007) We need a spoiler!
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles W/Wizard of Gore, The (1970) |
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| 35. The Sadist (1963) |
a.k.a. Profile of Terror
a.k.a. Sweet Baby Charlie
In this surprisingly good little psycho-thriller, Arch Hall, Jr., turns into an even more surprisingly good performance (surprising considering the rest of his cinematic legacy; see Eegah, for starters) as Charles A. "Charlie" Tibbs (inspired by the real-life Charles Starkweather), a sociopath who, with his girlfriend Judy (Marilyn Manning, Hall's girlfriend in Eegah), has left a trail of bodies in the wake of their travels.
His next victims are three high school teachers, Ed, Carl, and Doris (Richard Alden, Don Russell and Helen Hovey, respectively), on their way to a Dodgers game, who have engine trouble and pull into a junkyard in the middle of the desert. Unfortunately, for them, so do Charlie and Judy. Charlie forces Ed to fix his car, while holding the hapless teachers hostage and terrorizing them just for the hell of it.
After Charlie shoots and kills a couple of motorcycle cops who happen upon the scene, Ed blinds him momentarily with gasoline; during their scuffle, Charlie accidentally shoots and kills Judy. Ed runs, and Charlie chases him down and shoots him several times in the torso, and it's bye-bye to Ed.
Charlie then races into the desert after escapee Doris, who ends up in an abandoned house. Doris hides while Charlie skulks around on foot until he finds her, chases her again, and finally falls into a mine shaft, where's he's bitten repeatedly by a rattlesnake. Doris stops for a moment to listen to his dying screams, then leans on the car she came in and listens to the radio broadcasting the Dodgers game. (The sportscaster's voice is that of Arch Junior's dad and most frequent director, Arch Hall, Sr.). And then Doris walks away into the desert. (Why she walks instead of taking the car is a mystery; after all, it works — Charlie just used it to chase her down.)
Our take: It ain't Shakespeare, but again, this is a surprisingly good, gritty little movie, with genuine tension throughout. Until we saw The Sadist, we didn't know Arch Hall, Jr., had it in him! (And we're sorry he gave up acting to be a pilot.)
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles S/Sadist, The (1963) |
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| 36. Berserk (1967) |
After Gaspar the Great falls from his tightrope and dies, circus owner Monica Rivers (Joan Crawford) hires a new tightrope walker, Frank Hawkins (Ty Hardin), and the audience immediately begins to have a collective case of the dry heaves when the blond stud muffin begins a love affair with the most un-gracefully-aging Mommie Dearest.
Gaspar's death is only the first among several; Monica's partner Dorando (Michael Gough) is murdered; Matilda (Diana Dors) is sawn in half for real; and finally Frank himself falls from the tightrope onto a bunch of bayonets.
While folks suspect Monica is behind the murders (hey, it would be great publicity!), the real killer is Monica's daughter, Angela (Judy Geeson), who has been trying to ruin the circus because it took all of Monica's attention away from her. Once found out, Angela tries to kill Monica; failing that, she runs — right into a live wire during a storm, and is electrocuted. The End.
Our take: Not as laugh-out-loud hilarious as some of Crawford's cringe-making later efforts (say, the similarly-themed Strait-Jacket or the unbelievably bad Trog), but worth it if you want to see the faded star pretending she's a hot young thing desired by every man who sees her.
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles B/Berserk (1967) |
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| 37. Trog (1970) |
Three students exploring a cave run into Trog (short for "troglodyte"), who attacks and kills one of them. When the media gets wind of the killing, reporters (one of whom is Rona Newton-John, sister of Olivia Newton-John) try to film the cave-dwelling killer, who runs them off.
Anthropologist Dr. Brockton (Joan Crawford, in an embarrassing swan song to a long and varied career), convinced Trog is the missing link, prevents the cops from killing Trog, who is instead tranquilized and brought back to Dr. Brockton's lab. (Oh, the groans you will groan when Joan Crawford attempt to play catch with the man in the ugly caveman mask!)
Of course, Trog escapes (he has to, or there wouldn't be any more movie) and kills a dog before being captured again. When Dr. Selbourne (Jack May), Dr. Brockton's rival in science, and a land developer named Murdock (Michael Gough) attempt to set Trog loose (in order to screw over Dr. Brockton), Trog kills Murdock, goes on a rampage, and kidnaps a little girl from town.
Holding the army at bay while she attempts to rescue the girl (who's in no danger, being treated quite sweetly by Trog), Dr. Brockton enters the cave and brings the kid out. And then the army uses dynamite to blow the cave, and Trog, to smithereens. The End.
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles T/Trog (1970) |
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| 38. Strait-Jacket (1964) |
Lucy Harbin (Joan Crawford) has been released from a mental hospital twenty years after chopping up her husband (an uncredited Lee Majors) and his mistress with an axe as they were doing the nasty, and moves in with her brother and his wife (Leif Erickson and Rochelle Hudson) on their farm. Also living there is Lucy's daughter Carol (Diane Baker), who witnessed the double murder when she was just a tot. Carol seems to harbor no ill will toward her mother (or does she?), and even gets her to live it up a little — which Lucy does by dressing like a tramp and flirting with Carol's fiance, Michael (John Anthony Hayes).
Of course, there is a series of axe murders (Lucy's own doctor gets it first), and of course Lucy is the prime suspect — but, of course she's not the real killer; the real killer is Carol, who has not only been dressing like Lucy but has been wearing a wig and a perfect mask of Lucy's face (Carol is an artist, you see). After a risible wrestle-fight between mother and daughter (which reminds us more than a bit of the mother-daughter tussle in Mommie Dearest), Carol is the one now committed to the nuthouse. The End.
Our take: Unintentionally funny and fun — and in numerous ways similar to Berserk (1967).
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles S/Strait-Jacket (1964) |
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| 39. Wild Guitar (1962) |
South Dakota hick Bud Eagle (Arch Hall, Jr., he of Eegah, The Sadist, and the gigantic, pre-Flock of Seagulls blond pompadour) lands in Hollywood with nothing but his guitar and a ratty suitcase. At a coffee shop, he meets Vickie (Nancy Czar), a dancer (mainly a twister) who brings him along to a TV talent show on which she's appearing. When a sax player is too sick to go on, Bud takes his place and wows everybody, including scout/manager Mike McCauley (Arch Hall, Sr., credited here, as in Eegah, as William Watters, and who produced both this and Eegah under the pseudonym Nicholas Merriwether), who signs him and provides him with everything he could ever want, including a new guitar and a posh apartment with a closet full of new suits.
But Mike is a slimeball who manipulates Bud, has his right-hand man Steak (the film's director, Ray Dennis Steckler, appearing as he often did by the name Cash Flagg, one of his own many, many pseudonyms) bust up his fledgling relationship with Vickie, and keeps Bud cash-poor while making a mint off Bud's records and appearances. Bud tries to break off his business relationship with Mike, but Mike keeps him tethered by guilting him out over all the money Mike has sunk into Bud's career.
Vickie, though heartbroken, never abandons Bud, and when she sees him perform the song "Vickie" (which bad-film connoisseurs will recognize immediately from Eegah), she dashes down to the TV station (watch how many times people just waltz right into buildings that should be locked down, or at least guarded, especially at night) and the two are happily reunited. And then, when any other couple under the influence of a new romance would go make out, or make love, or just talk somewhere, these two go ice skating. (It's a dumb scene, probably inserted just to show off Czar's considerable talent on the ice.)
When Bud gets home, he has an unexpected guest: Don Proctor (Robert Crumb, not the graphic artist), a washed-up, drunken singer who let Mike ruin him and his career. He warns Bud about Mike, and Bud finally realizes Mike doesn't have his best interests at heart.
Meanwhile, Mike tells Steak to break up Bud and Vickie again, so Steak brings a slutty stripper-like gal named Daisy (Virginia Broderick) to the apartment. Daisy is coming on strong to Bud when Vickie enters and catches them in a compromising position. (While that's going on, Steak and Proctor fight, and Proctor ends up plummeting down a stairwell.) Vickie runs out into the street and Bud chases her, but he's kidnapped for ransom by three moronic, small-time hoods who have been hanging around the coffee shop.
At their hideout, even the naive Bud can see these hoods are no danger, and turns them into useful idiots in order to screw over Mike, by cooperating with their kidnapping scheme and egging them on to demand a larger ransom. They get $15,000 out of Mike, dropped in a garbage gan by Steak; when they return with the money, they want to share it with Bud, who turns it down. Just then, Steak bursts in; there's a fight, and Bud escapes.
Bud goes into hiding, taking a job as a dishwasher at the coffee shop, which Mike learns when he's approached by a young man who wants twenty dollars for revealing Bud's whereabouts. Meanwhile, when Vickie shows up at the coffee shop, the nice owner-lady calls Bud out of the kitchen and the two young lovers are once again reunited. Their lovey-dovey reunion is cut short when Mike and Steak burst in.
Bud and Steak fight, and then Bud gets Mike to admit to all his underhanded practices. That's when the young man who had dobbed in Bud appears with a tape recorder (which Mike had given Bud earlier); the guy is Bud's brother, who has recorded their conversation. At Bud's threat to make the tape public, Mike promises to be a good guy from now on, and Bud (the dope) keeps him on as his manager.
The end of the movie takes place at the beach, where Bud, in a white dinner jacket, performs a song called "Twist Fever" (amazing how he always has an invisible backup band playing along with him) while Vickie and a bunch of people who were just passing by start dancing. The End.— JR
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles W/Wild Guitar (1962) |
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| 40. Godzilla (1954) |
Gojira
a.k.a. Godzilla, King of the Monsters
After a Japanese fishing boat (as well as a rescue ship sent after it) is lost, scientists and reporters arrive on a nearby island to investigate. The natives say the culprit is Gojira (we like the sound of "Gojira" more than "Godzilla," so "Gojira" it is), some sort of god-like monster to which the natives sacrifice virgins.
Turns out Gojira, the result of a nuclear mishap, is a gigantic lizard-like biped that breathes fire. Fed up with attacks by the military, Gojira heads to Tokyo and stomps the city to pieces. The military tries to electrocute him with high-power lines, but that fails, too, and Gojira makes his further displeasure known with another building-crushing rampage. So much for Tokyo.
Meanwhile, there's a big subplot involving a dude named Serizawa whose fiancee wants to leave him for some other guy, but... who cares, really? Serizawa is the one who finally kills Gojira, coming up with a secret weapon that disintegrates Gojira as the big lizard sleeps at the bottom of the sea. Serizawa then drowns himself so he'll never be tempted to tell anyone how his secret weapon works.
The End. More or less. Except for all the sequels.
Followed by:
Godzilla Raids Again (1955) We need a spoiler!
King Kong vs. Godzilla (1962) We need a spoiler!
Mothra vs. Godzilla (1964) We need a spoiler!
Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster (1964) We need a spoiler!
Invasion of Astro-Monster (1965) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla Versus the Sea Monster (1966) We need a spoiler!
Son of Godzilla (1967)
Destroy All Monsters (1968) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla's Revenge (1969) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. the Smog Monster (1971) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Gigan (1972) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Megalon (1973) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla (1974) We need a spoiler!
Terror of Mechagodzilla (1975) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla 1985: The Legend Is Reborn (1984) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Biollante (1989) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah (1991) We need a spoiler!
Gojira vs. Mosura (1992) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla (1993) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Space Godzilla (1994) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Destroyah (1995) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla 2000 (1999) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla vs. Megaguirus (2000) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack (2001) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla Against MechaGodzilla (2002) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S. (2003) We need a spoiler!
Godzilla: Final Wars (2004) We need a spoiler!
Remade as:
Godzilla (1998) We need a spoiler!
Read more about Godzilla in our Disaster Movie Database!
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| From: Movie Spoilers/Titles G/Godzilla (1954) |
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